That’s quite a wonderful line from a rather spectacular song, but it goes deeper than that.
I personally believe (and research supports it) that relationships are the most important thing in our lives. Whether it be your family, your friends, even your co-workers. It’s all about the human connection.
Moreover, relationships have a significant effect on other aspects of your life. Whether it be job opportunities, lifestyle choices and everything in between.
However, some people find good relationships rather elusive, particularly romantic relationships. The issue is, relationships don’t work according to the regular patterns in life.
If you want to get good grades, you need to study hard. Yes, there are other factors, but by and large, that’s pretty much it.
However, if you want a great fulfilling relationship, you can’t force it.
To demonstrate that, think about your best friends (non-romantic friends). Do you remember having to work particularly hard? Or was it somewhat effortless? If you’re like me and most people I know, things just “clicked”.
Many people make the mistake of assuming they have to be someone else in order to find a fulfilling romantic relationship or even relationships in general. However, by not being yourself, you’re robbing yourself of the chance of ever meeting people who will truly be appropriate for you. As relationships are not business transactions. The best relationships are win-win, that is, you enjoy being with them just for who they are, and they, in turn, are attracted to you simply because of who you are.
So when you’re acting like someone else, yes, you might find “more” opportunities to connect, but these connections will be shallow and far from fulfilling. Don’t let your ego get the best of you. Less is more in this case. One true heartfelt relationship is much more significant than a hundred shallow relationships that require you to play a role, instead of being who you are.
By all means, I am not saying you should stop improving yourself, on the contrary. But improve yourself within the context of who you are, not of what society wants you to be, or what others may deem attractive.
By being who you are, while constantly improving, you will find that the best relationships are not something you have to chase or “get”, rather they will simply fit naturally as an integral part of your journey in life.
Continue improving yourself, but don’t try to be someone you’re not. Let the world know who you are. Those who will disagree shouldn’t be a part of your life. And those who will appreciate you, now know who you are.
From there, let things take care of themselves.
